Lace (1984)

What a waste of my time!!!

It's fun, it's light, [but] it has a hard time when its tries to get heavy.

The biggest problem with this movie is it’s a little better than you think it might be, which somehow makes it worse. As in, it takes itself a bit too seriously, which makes most of the movie feel kind of dull.

This is a dark and sometimes deeply uncomfortable drama

I loved the 80s. I was young, good-looking (if I say so myself), and life was fun (and don't let anyone tell you any different). That was usually reflected in films and TV series. That is why I hate anything contemporary. Forget trying to find escapism in the entertainment industry. Everything today is vulgar, loud, and crude at best; ugly, dark, broody, violent at worst. And don't even start me on European productions! Anybody seen Brit TV series, lately? They are the pit. All the men are evil, perverts, fat and ugly. The women are no better. Equally disagreeable, fat and ugly, they also pasty faces and muddy skins. Of course, not a trace of make-up among the lot of them (feminism insists). And everybody lives in depressing squalor and is tiresomely profane in some sort of English patois I can barely follow. I believe that is what certain people like to call "realism." For goodness sake, who the devil wants realism in entertainment. As Oscar Wilde put it, the less known about life's sores, the better.Anyway, tired and fed up with all the kitchen-sink drama fetish, I decided to explore the internet in search of some much-needed escapism. Thank goodness for YouTube.Yes, these soap operas have plots with more holes in them than Swiss cheese. Situations are barely believable. Everything is tinsel and fantastic (dear, oh, dear; no realism). But, oh, how refreshing to see luxury, glamour, beauty, for a change! Yes, people are still rotters. But I much prefer to see rotters in opulent surroundings than in dismal squalor. Men and women are gorgeous. Women are made- up (ok, maybe a bit too much). And, oh, look! They are all thin! If there are profanities, they are so few that I missed them.Lace is no different. I won't go into the plot and the faults. Everybody else covered that already. Still, if you are looking for a bit of relief from kitchen-sink drama go to YouTube, pour yourself some wine, put your feet up and enjoy a bit of true R&R.I know I'm going to get a lot of grief for my political incorrectness from the usual suspects. (Bleep) them. They can stick to their foul "realism" (no wonder they are so bitter). I get enough of that from real life.

In case anyone is interested, there is a Bollywood version of this story, called Dil Ashna Hai - a movie in Hindi, with music, made in about 1992.I haven't seen this English language original movie, just the Hindi one: it's fun. Shah Rukh Khan, technically probably the most famous movie star in the world (and my favorite too) has a medium-sized part in this one. The story is sweet.I only recently found out that the Indian movie was based on an American TV movie. I wish somebody who'd seen the TV movie would check this one out and write something here!!http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101732/

Four hours? I think it was more like 6 hours! I started watching it this afternoon. It was on the Oxygen Network after the movie "The Sure Thing". I'm still not sure why I started watching it. I just did. Like an IDIOT! Its just...what's the word....classic 80s. VERY melodramatic and very trashy. But it just sucks you in. You have to find out who this persons mother is. Its not a matter of entertainment, its a matter of the need to know.I realize I could just have easily gotten online and checked on any number of websites at any point during this torture, but no...I kept thinking it had to be ending soon. But it went on and on and on. Like the Energizer Bunny, only more annoying.But I do have to say, this movie was horrible in a truly fabulous way. It was decadant trash at its best. This movie has a place in cult classic history. But saints preserve me from watching it again before I've blocked the horror from my mind.

"Lace" reminds me of "lifestyles of the rich and famous"...the Aaron Spelling soaps "Dynasty" & "Hotel"..."Sins" starring Joan Collins...and that tv-movie with Stephanie Powers where she plays her own twin and gets blown up on a yacht. But I have to say that "Lace" was the absolute pinnacle of greed, glitz and excess in the 1980's. I can remember this being on tv when I was a kid and it seemed great back then. Now I look back and gag at the decadence of it all. I think this movie was filmed in every major city in Europe, New York, and some of the middle east. The budget had to be incredible! It was totally unbelievable which woman turned out to be Lily's mother, a huge let-down. I have to say that the best reason for watching "Lace" is to see how incredibly sexy and young Pheobe Cates was back then. Hubba Hubba!